First Light Read online

  “Oh, no. Not at all. They like Logan. The guys hang out quite a bit.”

  “How long until the restaurant opening?”

  “Lord. I’m so peeved we aren’t going to catch the summer season. I’m hoping Labor Day weekend. Still waiting on permits. If I knew who to bribe, I would. Say, do you think Logan knows?”

  “He doesn’t have anything to do with permits, does he?” I had never tried to open a business, but I remembered with some renovations on my beach home I’d had to get a permit. My contractor handled it, but I didn’t recall the police department, or Public Safety, as they called them here, getting involved.

  “I’m going to go ask him. He may know someone. I bet he knows everyone.”

  I set my pink and white flowers out of the way, near the back wall on the kitchen counter, as voices traveled through the open windows. Jasmine, Luna, and Alice all surrounded the outdoor shower, spraying the sand off their feet.

  The screen door creaked, and Jasmine’s excited expression warmed me from deep inside.

  “Are you ready?” I asked, beaming a smile back at her. “Can you believe Monday’s the big day?”

  “Do you want to come upstairs to see the outfit I picked out?”

  “I’d love to.”

  I waved to Luna and Alice before being tugged away by Jasmine. Upstairs in Jasmine’s bedroom, laid out neatly, were three different outfits.

  “Which would you have worn? When you were in high school?”

  “Well, that was what… twelve, fifteen… I don’t want to think about how long ago that was. But I had a uniform.” My grandparents had insisted I attend a private school.

  Jasmine’s selected outfits included a long yellow sundress with a pair of sandals, jeans and a loose flowing orange top and a pair of Converse tennis shoes, and pressed white shorts with a red cotton top and wedge sandals. I fingered the hem of the white shorts.

  “It’s supposed to be hot on Monday. Like around ninety-five degrees. I don’t know what the AC is like in your school, but maybe not jeans on the first day?”

  She nodded.

  “Are you good at walking around in these wedges?”

  “I’ve never worn them. All of this is new. It’s all part of my back-to-school shopping trip.”

  “Well, I vote for the sundress. It’s beautiful and still casual. It’ll be comfortable. Those sandals look comfortable. I think the temps cool down after this last heat wave, and then you can bring out the jeans. If I hadn’t had to wear a uniform, I would’ve lived in jeans. And actually, in college, I did live in jeans.”

  “What was your uniform like?”

  “Navy skirt, a white or red polo shirt.” Her eyes scrunched, a reaction to not recognizing a word. “Here, give me your phone.”

  We sat on her bed, at first searching for standard private school uniforms and polos. Thanks to weak Wi-Fi, the search took longer than it should. I downloaded the Pinterest app for her and showed her how you could search for outfits. Her eyes grew wide as ideas sprouted.

  “Dinner’s ready,” someone shouted.

  Downstairs, the hustle and bustle contrasted with the quiet of my current existence. I paused on the bottom stair, absorbing the commotion and energy. I’d so easily fallen into seclusion. But I missed this. And all I had to do to have more of this was start saying yes to these friends. And Erik agreed I could do so safely. Sure, life wasn’t perfect. Erik had more to do. I wanted to visit my parents. But this right here… it was what they called a good life. All I had to do was partake.

  “Hey, Jasmine, can you grab the tray I set up over there?” Luna pointed from the kitchen counter over to the kitchen table. “If you can carry the napkins and utensils, I think we’ve got everything.”

  The door slammed against the wall, and Tate entered, holding out a platter stacked high with grilled vegetables. Alice carried a white ceramic bowl filled with a tossed salad of thinly sliced strawberries and spinach. Luna stirred charred chopped bell peppers into a grain dish in another large bowl.

  “Head on out, guys. I’ll be right behind you.”

  A couple of salad dressing bottles remained on the counter, and I scooped them up and followed everyone along the boardwalk to the beach. They had set up a long table and secured the tablecloth to the legs to minimize the flapping in the wind. Folding chairs lined both sides of the table.

  On the south side of the island, you could see where the Atlantic merged with the Cape Fear off in the distance. I pointed to the horizon, far out over the choppy water where the land line emerged.

  “I bet you have a beautiful view of the sunset here.”

  Logan pulled a chair out for me, his hand on the back of the white plastic, waiting for me to sit. “They do.”

  “I love eating out here,” Jasmine said.

  “We’d do it more often, but it’s a lot of work to carry everything out, then bring it back in,” Luna responded.

  “If you wanted to eat on the beach tonight, we could have had you on our deck,” Gabe offered.

  Poppy patted his hand and said, “But they have a better view of the sunset over here. It’s gorgeous. I like it right here.”

  “Do you want to move over here? To this side?” Gabe appeared mystified.

  Poppy rolled her eyes, exasperated. “No. I’m only saying it’s nice here. Jasmine, tell us what classes you’re going to be taking.”

  Logan leaned over and asked, “Can I get you wine? They opened a cab and chardonnay. Or beer is in the cooler.”

  “I can get it.” I moved to get up, and he reached for my hand.

  “What’ll it be?”

  “Chardonnay. Thank you.”

  We passed the dishes around family style, and before digging in, Tate toasted Jasmine. “To life changes, the big ones and the small ones. And the ones that seem so big, but in reflection, aren’t that big at all.” Quizzical and amused expressions circled the table. “What I mean is, Jasmine, I’m sure you have a world of emotions before starting your new school in your newly adopted country, but I suspect that within a week, it won’t feel daunting at all. Some steps in life feel enormous, but when you actually take them, you realize it’s just one step.”

  Over the course of dinner, the sky transitioned to a haze of pinks and oranges. Island dwellers gathered along the coastline in small groups, many with drinks in hand, to observe the sunset. Pinks and oranges mixed across the horizon as the slim, bright glow of the sun slipped behind the trees bordering the horizon and day gave way to night.

  Gabe, Poppy, Logan, and I said our goodnights at the same time with a chorus of “Good luck, Jasmine.”

  As I hugged her goodbye, I tipped her chin up and told her, “As soon as you get back on Monday, come find me. I want to hear all about it.”

  “That was nice,” Logan said as we drove away. “Thanks for inviting me.”

  “It’s a good group,” I said. “Being there tonight made me miss my family. Or, I suppose, just people.”

  “I do. I think that was one of my biggest adjustments after, you know. Getting used to living alone. Being the only one in the house. Do you have a big family?”

  “No. But, growing up, my grandparents on both sides came over a lot. And then, college. People are always around. I had roommates. I miss it.” As I said the words, I realized how much I missed my old life. But, living here, I didn’t have to be isolated. To an extent, I had done that to myself. I could have been a part of this group of friends for a long time. They had been open; I had been the closed one.

  I pulled to a stop in front of his house and turned to say goodnight.

  “Thanks for coming.”

  His arm rested on the ledge of the seat cushion. He bent his head. In the moonlight, his chocolate-colored eyes shone black. The pounding of my heart intensified, and I wondered if he could hear it. In slow motion, his lips brushed across mine with the slightest pressure. A tingling sensation lit my skin, from the tips of my fingers, along my throat, to the ends of my toes.

 
; Then he backed out of the golf cart. The air, crisp and fresh, filled my lungs. He rested his hands on the top of the golf cart and peered down at me. In the dark, I couldn’t see his eyes, but I felt his gaze in my bones. He opened his mouth. I could swear he was going to speak, but after a pause, he straightened and walked along the path to his front door.

  The kiss boggled my mind. I pressed the accelerator. So quickly, it might have been a figment of my imagination, except my breath came out in short, quick bursts. I slowed as I approached the turn off his street and glanced back to his front yard, to the scene of the kiss. He remained on the path, both hands in his pockets, watching me drive away.

  All the giddiness returned in waves. What a good date. We had a really good date.

  Nym trotted up when I returned home, and like a buffoon, I told him all about it. “Hey, boy. So, guess what? Your mommy had a good time. A really good time. Yes. I know. So hard to believe. With the good-looking man. The one you like. Yes.” Nym’s tail flapped back and forth. “And he kissed me. Yes. I know. He did.” I squealed, because why not? Nym wouldn’t tell anyone.

  After locking the front door, I returned to the kitchen to freshen Nym’s water bowl for the night and to give him a treat for being such a good boy. My BlackBerry vibrated on the counter. An unknown number. Erik.

  “Hey, there.”

  “Mom told me about Dad’s skin cancer. I checked out his medical records. It’s nothing to worry about.”

  “What do you mean—”

  “I got onto the hospital network. It’s nothing. Mom’s assessment is correct.”

  I closed my eyes and grimaced as a familiar pain surfaced. “I don’t think it’s worth breaking federal laws. If you ask Mom and Dad questions, they’ll just tell you the answer.”

  “It’s easy, so why not?”

  “You’re addicted, Erik. Seriously. It’s like an addiction.”

  “Cali. It’s nothing. I knew you’d be worried. So was I. He’s fine.” That wasn’t the point, but I didn’t have it in me to attempt once more to convey right versus wrong to my brother.

  “Anyway, did you go out on that date with that cop?”

  “Logan? Yes, tonight, actually.” Funny you should bring it up.

  “Cali, NSA came out to the island a couple of days ago. I just found out about it. And they met with Logan. In his office. I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to spend time with him.”

  “What? You cleared him.”

  “I know. But, Cali, something’s not right. That guy came down from D.C. Do you know how inconvenient that is? And he was there for a few hours. Some dipshits are theorizing locations for our servers. I think he came down to brief Logan. Cali, spending time with that guy isn’t smart. It’s risky.”

  “Erik.” The whine in my response sounded childlike. This is ridiculous. And what does it matter? I can be friends with someone without them learning about you.

  “Cali, you let him in your home. Think about it for a minute. What he can notice. What he might see.”

  “What would he possibly see? There’s nothing here.” Everything that might incriminate Erik was out at the office. Erik built a safe room for me, just in case, but even if he discovered that, it would look odd. That was it. I could say the previous owner built it.

  “You let him in to go to the bathroom. Then you go on a date. Then there will be another. Before you know it, he’s over all the time. He’ll see a text, or something will pique his interest. If he spends enough time around you, he will get suspicious.” Suspicious…the word rattled around in my head.

  “How did— Oh. My. God. You watch my camera feeds. You told me those were for security.”

  “They are. And the security team let me know he entered the back door.”

  “I thought you only had cameras over the front door?”

  “Cali, we’ve been over this. Why did he stop by and need to use the bathroom?”

  “How did you know he went to the bathroom? Wait. You have cameras inside my home? And a team of people watch them?”

  “Cali, you’ve got to think through this. It’s a downward slope into unnecessary risk.”

  “I want those cameras turned off.”

  “No.”

  “No? I’ll go around and disengage them. I’ll put tape over the lens or pull them out of the wall. I’m serious. I don’t like the idea of a random room of people watching me. That’s creepy. And reporting to you! Over a door is one thing. No. Just no.”

  “How did you think those cameras worked?”

  “I thought if the alarm was triggered, the security company looked at footage of the outside of the house to see what triggered the alarm. I never thought at any random hour they were watching, especially inside my home.”

  “Cali, that’s how every security system works.”

  “No. That can’t be.” I crossed my arms. A camera in the office, over his precious servers. Fine. I got that. One over the front door—totally normal. You could buy a similar device in Target and put it over your front door. Cameras inside my home? Forget it. No.

  “This guy has a military intelligence background. He’s going to pick up on things. You have to be careful—”

  “Erik.” I circled my den, gritting my teeth, while scanning the room for cameras.

  “You know what it would do to Mom and Dad if we’re caught… if I’m caught. It would devastate them.”

  Yes, if their golden son went to jail, it would most definitely devastate them. On that, we agreed.

  “Remember, we don’t live in a binary world. There’s no such thing as a good or bad side. He works for the other side, and you can’t trust him. Spending time with him isn’t smart.”

  I rolled my eyes but held my tongue. There was no point in arguing. I’d debated him down the conspiracy rabbit’s hole too many times in the past.

  “You said it was fine.” That was the most important point here. He said I could go out with Logan.

  “That was before NSA made a special trip out to meet with him. For like an hour. What could he have possibly had to say that he couldn’t risk being overheard? Tell me that.” I couldn’t think of answers for him. Irritation and frustration and other nasty emotions threatened to boil.

  “You promised me. This was supposed to be temporary.”

  “Cali, Jesus, you sound like you’re going to cry.”

  “I’m not crying.” I want to punch something. There’s a difference.

  “If you want to date him, fine. I can’t stop you. Just be wary. Be smart. It’s so fucking easy to slip up.” A deep male voice resonated, and I waited, listening to the muffled exchange between Erik and the stranger. “I gotta run. Love you, sis. It’ll all be over soon. Trust me.”

  Chapter 10

  Logan

  * * *

  Thanks again for last night. Are you available for a date?

  I stared at the text. Pressed the delete key repeatedly.

  Thanks again for last night. Would you like to go out on a date with me?

  Jesus. I never did like dating. Every text I wrote looked awkward. Back in the day, I had game. What the hell happened?

  Thanks again for last night. Any chance I can repay you? Dinner tonight at my place?

  I set my phone down on my desk. I didn’t press send. Dinner tonight at my place? Does that sound slimy? The winds were optimal today for windsurfing. I could offer to take her out, although that could be frustrating if she’s never done it before. My phone on my desk rang at the same time Colin, one of the men on my team, rapped his knuckle against my office doorframe. If she wanted a poet, or some super creative date, it wasn’t going to work out. I pressed send.

  At 10:36, in the middle of a communications status meeting, she responded.

  Sure. What can I bring?

  “Good news?”

  Tamara, our communications director, wore an annoying grin on her face. Chad set his iPad down.

  “What?” he asked, confusion evident as he glanced around the t
able to each of us. As mayor, he loved attending our weekly status. I suspected his monthly email to the island was his favorite monthly activity. He injected quite a bit of opinion and personal flair to the lengthy emails. But when in meetings, he generally lost interest.

  “Was that smile over something in my website data?” Tamara asked.

  “What?” Chad looked as lost as I felt.

  “Never mind. Sorry.” She continued grinning.

  “Please continue with your summary. I’m listening.” I tapped out a quick just yourself response and returned to the business at hand.

  I left the office an hour early, stopped by the market, and picked up baked potatoes, Brussel sprouts, and two filets. Once home, I jumped in the shower, ironed a loose-fitting button-down shirt, and debated between slacks or jeans. The slacks won out.

  Yes, it’d been years since I’d been in the dating game, but I hadn’t forgotten the steps. I had forgotten the nerves. I couldn’t recall actually being nervous with Bethany. When we’d started dating, it happened naturally. I’d been new to Chicago, and she was a junior DA. A very junior, overworked assistant to the assistant DA, but one of her cases had been one of mine. We’d celebrated a win out at the bar with the crew, hooked up, and she took charge. Everything fell into place.

  No need thinking about the past. Going down memory lane wasn’t the way to kick off a new relationship. Relationship—damn if I wasn’t getting ahead of myself. A date. That was all. And it was about damn time I re-entered the dating world. Divorce and scandal didn’t mean my life had to end. Bethany’s life sure hadn’t.

  With the flat side of my chef’s knife, I flattened the garlic cloves, then chopped them into fine slivers, perfect for working into the sides of a filet. Cali’s smile came to mind as she ran by on the beach earlier today. She must’ve been running behind today, because I normally crossed paths at the end of her run, when she was checking her watch and counting her pulse rate. She never broke pace, but she’d smiled and waved. If she’d stopped, I would’ve told her to bring Nym. I considered texting her but figured it was too much.